Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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