i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize