This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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