I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
