That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
are you so shy because you have an std?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
