you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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