...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I still have a little drunk in my system
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
