insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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