Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
sex in a hospital.. check
Randomize
