theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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