I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
