My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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