i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
he was CRYING into my vagina
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
