their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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