She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
His nipple licking is glorious
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize