just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
