wake up i wanna do it froggy style
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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