She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
