oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
