even my farts smell like vagina
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
