just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I got inside last night via doggy door
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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