please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
