evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Church boner. Awkwardddd
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
