trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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