if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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