if i can run in heels then i can drive
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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