The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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