Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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