Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
