Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize