hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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