And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
