I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He did a backflip because drugs
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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