I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
