K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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