Whod you bang
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
