Kareoke will never be a sober sport
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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