didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
