Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize