I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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