I just threw up on my dentist
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize