I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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