Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
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