that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
