Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
