you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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