just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
