The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
