This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
