they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
