I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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