I will die if light touches me.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
We are all done wearing pants today
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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